Embracing Holiday Emotions: Flourishing Through the Season

Tips

The holiday season can bring a complex mix of emotions. Traveling can be exciting yet stressful. Revisiting old memories can be joyful yet sometimes bittersweet. Family gatherings may offer warmth but can also reignite past tensions, while gift-giving may bring about both joy and financial concerns. As we reflect on the past year, we may feel pride, regret, or renewed purpose—all woven together in this season.

Fortunately, with a few psychology-backed tips, we can embrace and celebrate every emotion as a unique opportunity for balance, growth, and connection as we close the book on 2024.

Here are five common holiday emotions and practical ways to navigate them effectively.

1. Stress over perfectionism

  • What it feels like: The holidays can bring a rush of excitement—seeing loved ones, celebrating traditions, and creating new memories. But sometimes this excitement brings a sense of pressure to make things “perfect.”
  • Flourishing tip: Shift your focus to moments of genuine connection. Each day, aim to share a simple act of kindness—express gratitude, offer a heartfelt compliment, or take a moment for a meaningful conversation with a loved one. These small moments can remind us that the true magic of the holidays lies in connection, rather than perfect execution of the logistics.

2. Overwhelm

  • What it feels like: Juggling travel plans, gatherings, and gift-giving can be both fun and overwhelming, especially when there’s so much to organize.
  • Flourishing tip: Set boundaries around your time and energy. Allow yourself short breaks to relax, even if it’s just 10 minutes, to reset and recharge during the day. These moments can be as simple as making your favorite cup of tea, stepping outside for a refreshing walk, calling a friend for a quick chat, or listening to your favorite holiday playlist.

3. Nostalgia

  • What it feels like: Holidays often bring up memories, both happy and bittersweet. While reminiscing can be comforting, it may also stir up a sense of loss or longing for the past.
  • Flourishing tip: Embrace the memories by creating space for them—write down a favorite holiday story, or share it with someone close. Letting these memories flow can turn nostalgia into gratitude and deepen connections with those around you.

4. Loneliness

  • What it feels like: For those separated from loved ones, the holidays can amplify feelings of loneliness, making it easy to feel disconnected.
  • Flourishing tip: Seek out small moments of connection. Reach out to a friend for a meaningful conversation, attend a local event, or even volunteer—it’s a great way to feel connected to others and bring positivity to the season.

5. Financial Worries

  • What it feels like: Gift-giving, travel, and holiday expenses can quickly add up, leaving many of us feeling financially stretched.
  • Flourishing tip: Set a holiday budget and explore thoughtful, low-cost ways to show you care, like writing heartfelt notes or creating a small, homemade gift. The thoughtfulness behind a gift often means more than its price.

When Emotions Ebb and Flow…

The “1-2-3 of Emotion Regulation,” grounded in affective science research, can help us navigate holiday emotions—positive or negative—with mindfulness and self-compassion. Here are two examples of putting this approach into practice:

Example 1: Mike’s Nostalgia
Every holiday, Mike recalls joyful family gatherings at his grandmother’s house, where they baked cookies and shared stories. But this year feels different, as it’s his first holiday since she passed away, making his memories both warm and bittersweet.

  • Step 1: Awareness. Mike identifies his emotions as a mix of joy from cherished memories and sadness over his grandmother’s absence.
  • Step 2: Insight. He recognizes that this nostalgia is a reflection of the deep bond he was able to share with his grandmother and the important role she has played in his life. 
  • Step 3: Action. To honor her memory, Mike bakes his grandmother’s favorite cookies and shares stories about her with his family, turning his nostalgia into a meaningful tribute.
  • Flourishing Activities: “Blast from the Past” helps Mike revisit memories, while a “Mood Check-In” encourages him to acknowledge and honor his emotions with self-compassion and self-insights.

Example 2: Jennifer’s Stress and Overwhelm
As the family planner, Jennifer is organizing their holiday gathering, juggling lists, food prep, and decorations. But as the day nears, the pressure to make everything perfect starts to overshadow the joy of connecting, turning the holiday into a series of tasks.

  • Step 1: Awareness. Jennifer pauses and realizes her stress stems from wanting everything to go flawlessly.
  • Step 2: Insight. She understands that this focus on perfection is pulling her away from what matters most—connecting with her family.
  • Step 3: Action. Jennifer shifts her approach, focusing on cooking just two dishes she loves and asking her family to contribute their favorite items. This lets her relax, enjoy conversations, and feel more present. Her family notices the difference and leaves with cherished memories of genuine connection.
  • Flourishing Activities: “Meaningful Conversations,” “Gratitude Note,” and “Gifting a Compliment” help Jennifer prioritize connection, which makes the holiday feel less stressful and more emotionally fulfilling.

By recognizing our emotions and listening to the messages they communicate, we can make this holiday season one of balance, joy, connection, and growth.

Resources To-Go

Developed by Stanford-trained psychologists, the Flourish app offers personalized insights and daily inspirations to help you practice the 1-2-3 of emotion regulation and simple actions to reduce stress, discover joy, build habits, and foster deeper connections. 

Get it for free, and start flourishing today!

References

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